(Written by Allie Vecchiet*) Are you ever surprised at how irritated or flustered you become in the presence of a specific colleague at work? Do you ever feel your blood pressure and temper rise from zero to sixty when reading an email? Can you think back to any interactions that you walked away from feeling disappointed with how emotional you became and how you acted? In Marshall Goldsmith’s Triggers, he reminds us that we have a choice in how we respond and provides strategies for overcoming these trigger points.
Goldsmith starts off by stating that it is extremely hard to change our behaviors. He points out that the more aware we are of our specific triggers, the more control we will have over our reactions. We already do this in the big moments (most of the time), but it is the little moments that trigger some of our most outsized and unproductive responses.
Below are two strategies that Goldsmith proposes we use to change our behaviors and increase awareness of triggers:
- Self-question using active questions: Active questions are the alternative to passive questions. For example, “Do you have clear goals?” is a passive questions, versus, “Did you do your best to set clear goals for yourself?” which is an active question. It challenges someone to describe or defend a course of action. Passive questions can be the natural enemy of taking personal responsibility and demonstrating accountability.
- Action item: Develop a list of active questions you want on your behavioral change list that start with, “did I do my best to…”
- AIWATT ("Am I willing, at this time, to make the investment required to make a positive difference on this topic?”): Similar to the physician’s principle, “first, do no harm,” AIWATT doesn’t require you to do anything, merely avoid doing something you will regret. It is a delaying mechanism each of us should use in the time between trigger and behavior. It helps delay our prideful, cynical, judgmental, argumentative, and selfish responses to our triggering environment. It’s a reminder that our environment tempts us many times a day to engage in negative interactions and we can do something about it – by doing nothing.
- Action item: Use AIWATT whenever you must choose to either engage or “let it go.”
“At this time” = reminds us that we are operating in the present
“To make the investment” = reminds us that responding to others is work
“To make a positive difference” = reminder that we can help create a better us or a better world
“On this topic” = reminds us to focus on the specific matter at hand
Consider this scenario: You have to attend a one-hour meeting that you know will be pointless and a waste of your time. You have no interest in pretending that you are happy to be there. You have a bored, tired look on your face just to make the point that this meeting is a total waste of your time. When the meeting ends, you are the first one out the door.
If you took time after the meeting to self-question (see #1 above) yourself about how you chose to spend that hour, how would you score? Did you do your best to be happy? Did you do your best to find meaning? Did you do your best to build positive relationships? Did you do your best to be fully engaged?
Questions/Thoughts to consider:
- What are your triggers? Is there anyone in your workplace that triggers your emotions and causes you to lose control?
- Can you think of a time when you reacted to a trigger and regretted it afterwards?
- What active questions can you ask yourself every day to help change your behavior and attitude towards certain triggers? How can you incorporate the AIWATT exercise into your daily routine?
- When you ask yourself, “did I do my best…” does it help you to be more self-aware? Do you tend to blame others, the day of the week, or the amount of sleep you got the night before for your behaviors?
Comments? What are your triggers?
*Allison Vecchiet, PharmDPGY1/PGY2
Health-System Pharmacy Administration Resident
Nationwide Children's Hospital
M.S. Health-System Pharmacy Administration Candidate 2016
The Ohio State University College of Pharmacy
Email: Sturm.42@osu.edu