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Being Tactful

By Sara White posted 06-08-2014 10:01

  

Are you always as tactful as you know you should be? The Mind Tools Club has the following advice.

  • Tact is the ability to tell the truth in a way that considers other people’s feelings and reactions while giving difficult feedback, communicate sensitive information, and say the right thing to preserve the relationship.
  • When we communicate tactfully, we can preserve relationships, build credibility, and demonstrate thoughtfulness.
  • When you communicate with grace and consideration, you will stand out from the crowd and you will get noticed for the right reasons, which can lead to other career opportunities.
  • Tact can help you avoid conflict, find common ground, and allow others to save face thus being an asset in negotiations and conflict resolution.
  • You need to handle issues assertively not aggressively nor submissively. Remember assertive is stating your ideas/needs without stepping on others while aggressive is not worrying about others and submissive is not sharing your ideas/needs.
  • Developing tact
    • Create the right environment and think before you speak by being an active listener first and asking questions to be sure you completely understand the situation before you say anything.
    • Determine the appropriate time means being conscious of who you are with and where you are before you speak thus being discreet
    • Choose your words carefully such as avoid using “You” but rather using “I” statements thus taking ownership of your feelings instead of placing blame.  When you are in a tense situation, be concise versus rambling and saying things you may regret later.
    • Watch your body language and be sure it matches your message.   Eye contact and a courteous vocal tone communicates your truthfulness and willingness to work together.
    • Never react emotionally such as giving yourself time to calm down if you feel angry or upset before your respond.  Pay attention to people and words that trigger your emotions so you can either walk away or pause before you respond.
  • Always think carefully before you speak and consider how someone else might interpret your words. Use active listening skills, pay attention to your body language, and never react emotionally. However make sure that you still get your message across and that you continue to be appropriately assertive.

What is the toughest part for you in being tactful?



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